When I was younger, I remembered all the little things. From the animal crackers I ate with my mom at Daytona Beach to what my preschool teacher’s favorite brand of coffee was. However, now as a junior in high school, I feel like I lack that skill my three-year-old self possessed. 

Growing up, I had it all. I was an only child adopted from China into a small Midwestern family with a lot of love and all the time in the world for their “precious angel.” I spent most of my childhood jumping in piles of leaves and riding my tricycle up and down my grandparents’ driveway creating memories that I still cherish to this day. Back then, I felt like I had all the time in the world. 

Those memories are forever imprinted in my mind, as the carefree childhood I once had that has now been drowned out by my neverending list of responsibilities. With the ACT coming up in December, volleyball season wrapping up and grades to tend to, it seems like time has become so valuable but yet there is still never enough. The small tasks like wishing someone a happy birthday have even become difficult for me because there seems to always be “something more important” to tend to.

Looking back on my three-year-old days, a lot has changed. I have learned so much and because of it I have grown and matured and extremely fast. In the course of a year, my family has gone from my mom, dad and I to just my dad and I. However, that is the thing. The world does not just stop because something tragic happens. The world keeps spinning, and the nightmare that you are living now becomes a reality that you must live in every day. There is such little time in life to recollect those simple memories that are supposed to last a lifetime. Recently, remembering has really become a chore more than a luxury.

Most days I wish I could go back and ride up and down my grandparents’ driveway once more but I know that is not realistic. I will forever wish that time was not treated like some option that we can throw around like how I throw clothes around before school when I can never find anything to wear. I cherish that skill of remembering the little things, but realistically, there is so much to remember and my brain can barely keep up. I will forever be thankful for the time I do get to spend with the people reminiscing on the memories that make me who I am.