"The best way to predict your future is to create it." Abraham Lincoln

Lincoln High School Statesman

"The best way to predict your future is to create it." Abraham Lincoln

Lincoln High School Statesman

"The best way to predict your future is to create it." Abraham Lincoln

Lincoln High School Statesman

Year after year, flowers, specifically roses, have been one of the most popular gifts given on Valentine’s Day, proving to be a truly timeless gesture.

What your preferred Valentine’s Day gift reveals about you

Ellie Quinn, Staff Writer February 6, 2024

As this upcoming holiday full of love quickly approaches, it is important to recognize the tradition of gift-giving and some of its most popular forms, but what does your preferred gift say about you?  Chocolate:...

An overwhelmed LHS senior studies for their third attempt at the ACT.

How to ace the ACT

Ryan Calhoun, Staff Writer November 23, 2023

With the semester quickly coming to a close, the juniors of LHS are realizing they should probably start paying attention to their GPAs, and the seniors are acclimatizing to a constant sense of panic....

Secrets from a part-time rizzler

Secrets from a part-time rizzler

Nathan Thompson, News Editor November 13, 2023

Day One: Start at the beginning. You have to pick out which girl you’re going to get. This shouldn’t be too difficult for a super stud muffin like you though. You basically can have your pick....

LHS sophomore Callaway Weeks, a 6’ 3” tyrant, ignores LHS junior Katya Surendran, a 5’0” queen, revealing a perpetual inequality between heights.

Tall people are annoying

Shalom Kato, Staff Writer November 13, 2023

One day during the passing period, I walked in the halls attempting to get to statistics. I felt a balance shift in the atmosphere and perhaps the time continuum. I look up and see an extremely tall brunette...

In the candy tier list, the candies closest to the letter are the best in that category, while the bottom ones are the worst in that tier.

The ultimate Halloween candy tier list

Will Hansen, Staff Writer November 6, 2023

As Halloween comes to a close, kids are diving into their candy buckets to see what candy they’ve gotten. However, there’s always been some dispute on what candy is best to receive, and what candy...

The decline in journalistic integrity did not just begin with social media, it began when people created livelihoods built on selling the truth.

Why journalists shouldn’t tell the truth (A Satire)

Katya Surendran, Perspectives Editor November 6, 2023

In the midst of the age of social media, many claim that journalistic integrity has been in decline. Whether you’re reading an article about the aliens that are going to blow up the world tomorrow, ...

The only aesthetic picture taken on this trip, although in reality we were lost, as seen by the never-ending horizon. (Picture used with permission by Audrey Barbush)

10 kayaking tips to avoid being stranded in the Gulf of Mexico

Kate Barbush, Staff Writer October 5, 2023

“Just relax, everything will be okay,” said the kayak owner. “Whatever happens will be memorable, you know.” These were the last words my family and I heard before our bright orange and green rented...

People love sleep; for most teens this is something they look forward to.

What your sleep position says about you (satire)

Natalie Nolan, Staff Writer January 18, 2023

People love sleep; for most teens this is something they look forward to. Sleep is a safe space for many, and it gives people a chance to escape reality and refresh for the next day. With all of the stress...

These recognizable stores are having huge sales on the last day of February

Places to shop Feb. 29

Daniel Valentine, Staff Writer January 6, 2023

This February, certain choice stores are having phenomenal deals on Feb. 29. This day is similar to Black Friday, and has deals for cleaning out winter items. Either way, do not miss out on these sweet...

This website tests its users on a variety of different tests ranging from reaction time to number memory, before showing where the testee stands in comparison to the rest of the population.

The existential horror of humanbenchmark.com

Fisher Meyerink, Staff Writer December 12, 2022
There is nothing more devastating than finishing a test and realizing that you are in the bottom 5% of the population in terms of your reaction time or your verbal memory...
As much as us humans would like to believe we are the best and most successful species on this planet, we are far from perfect when it comes to our bodies. Here are just a few things that I would change to make us just a little bit better.

What I would change about the human body

Fisher Meyerink, Staff Writer December 5, 2022

As much as us humans would like to believe we are the best and most successful species on this planet, we are far from perfect when it comes to our bodies. Here are just a few things that I would change...

The agonizing screen I have to see every time CK-Express decides it needs to conduct an update check.

CK-Express, we need to talk…

Delaney Gramlick, Entertainment Editor October 28, 2022

Dear CK-Express, You’re ruining my life. Every day, every second is plagued by your incessant need to torment me. I open my chromebook and what is staring back at me? CK-Express. Oh you need to switch...

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