Living the double life


Used with Permission by Canva/Natalie Nolan

According to Legaljobs. 37.6% of marriages in the United States end in divorce.

Natalie Nolan, Staff Writer

No one has a perfect family, however, some are more imperfect than others.

Family is enough work as it is, but when one’s family lives separately it is a bit more difficult. Having divorced parents may sound nice at first; You get two Christmases and double the presents, but it is not as glamorous as some people make it sound. 

During the holidays, Christmas cheer is spread and people are often in a great mood and excited to see family. However, the mood changes when you live in two different houses. Each year is different; one year I will go to my dad’s and then the next year I will be with my mom. What gets confusing is that sometimes I am with the same parent a few years in a row and years pass before I see a certain side of my family. During Thanksgiving, one would imagine their whole family gathered around, but because of the two houses, I never see my whole family and Thanksgiving feels incomplete. Christmas has also been a struggle due to my day being split into two and the tones in the houses being completely different. Each house has a different vibe, but you do not know how to describe it, you just sense a change. 

The most difficult aspect of having divorced parents is guilt. For me, if I prefer being at one house over the other, I immediately feel bad about it. It was not until a few years later I was able to come to terms with the feeling and realize it does not define how I feel about my parents. Lastly, the exchange between my parents was never easy. When the time came, I could never bring myself to leave. Whenever I was gone with one parent, I always seemed to miss the other one. It may not sound that bad now, but for a seven-year-old kid, it was one of the hardest lessons I learned. But everyone is different, so the impact of the separation can alter one kid’s life more than another. 

Divorce can have different impacts on kids. The National Library of Medicine states that kids with divorced parents are less likely to finish high school and go to college. Divorce can have lasting effects on a kid’s life and it can determine their future. 

Divorce has added a lot of obstacles to my life and some of them are more difficult to overcome than others. It just takes time and there are some things that will never seem okay. The biggest difficulty of divorce is coming to terms with the new life you are given. In the end, divorce is a difficult thing but it gives you a new perspective on life that will impact your future.