On Nov. 1, 2018, my little sister, Zoe Quinn, was born in San Bernardino, California. My dad and stepmom, Joe and Emily Quinn, did not know about Zoe until just before her birth. As they bounced name ideas back and forth on the plane, they kept returning to the name Zoe. The name Zoe means life, and my little sister is just that.
Zoe was not officially adopted until Feb. 6, 2020, just before the country shut down due to the COVID-19 pandemic. To formally adopt Zoe into our family, we needed permission from the Indigenous tribe of which Zoe’s biological mother is a part. Zoe is part Native American and part Hispanic as her biological mother was Native American and her biological father was Hispanic (to our knowledge). This factor of getting Zoe’s adoption approved by her biological mother’s tribe made the adoption process lengthy, but well worth it. Through adoption, Zoe can live in a stable household with loving people surrounding her, which would not be the case if she continued living with her birth parents.
November marks National Adoption Month, and without adoption, my family would be missing a vital piece of our family puzzle. According to Adoption Choice Inc., adopted children grow up in a home that is loving, stable and full of opportunities and resources that would otherwise be unavailable to them. Adoption also provides opportunities to create a family for so many families who are unable to have children themselves.
Many people neglect adoption as a vessel for creating a family, but it is a much-needed resource, even in South Dakota. According to the Children’s Home Society of South Dakota, “By becoming an adoptive parent, you provide so much more than a home for a child. You provide a resource, a relationship, a sense of belonging, security, and safety.” It makes sense that parents prefer to have children that reflect their genes, but adoption should not scare people away from having a family. Adoption should not challenge the validity of parental love and affection. It is important to keep options open when considering methods of starting a family.
When I tell people my sister is adopted, I often get mixed responses. For many, family is rooted in shared blood, but, for my family, that looks a little different. For us, family is not created through a shared lineage or family tree, but instead, family is formed through loving one another. Even though Zoe has somewhat darker skin than I do, she is not any less of my sister because she comes from two people I have no connection to. By adopting Zoe my family became complete.
