Top scientists: climate change not that big of a deal anymore

We did it guys


Photo by Slater Dixon

This tree will continue to prosper thanks to this momentous achievement

Slater Dixon, Perspectives editor

Take note of this moment; scientists from organizations including NASA, the American Meteorological Society and the United Nations have made a startling announcement: climate change is officially not that big of a deal now. 

What was once thought of as the greatest issue facing humanity is now receiving a shoulder shrug from scientists around the globe. One such scientist is Dr. Mike Green, a climate researcher at NASA who released a report on the discovery Wednesday afternoon. 

“For the longest time, we thought that climate change was going to have immeasurable effects on the food supply, worldwide biodiversity and quality of life. The general consensus was that decades of unchecked exploitation of natural resources has created an unsustainable standard of living for a small percentage of the world’s population,” said Green. “In the past few months, however, we have noticed a dramatic change in climate indicators. These sudden drops make it seem like we are doing something right.” 

Other climate organizations quickly confirmed Green’s report, stating that they have seen the same shift. Ocean acidification, global warming, melting perma-frost, the o-zone: they’re no longer problems. Although it has puzzled scientists around the globe, there are many factors that have played into the reversal. Plastic straw bans, electric scooters and “green” corporations are all cited as reasons. The U.N.’s official report, however, cited an Instagram trend as the largest contributing factor.

“Basically how these accounts work is you like or share a photo and a nameless entity plants a tree,” said the U.N. We don’t really know the specifics since the accounts never have an external link, but atmospheric C02 levels have suddenly dropped back down to pre-industrial revolution levels so we guess that they’re probably doing something.”

When asked for a more detailed statement, a U.N. representative pointed to the convenience of the Instagram tree posts as a reason for their popularity.

“When it comes to the environment, everybody wants to save the earth or whatever, but nobody wants to sacrifice anything to do it,” said the U.N. “The magic of liking or sharing these posts is that you get to feel good about helping the earth without having to do something about your personal carbon footprint.”